The page is blank. The canvas has been wiped clean. The room has been cleared out. The proverbial walls have been put up mainly for protection; to keep the foolishness of this world out. Soon new wallpaper will be put up on those walls. It's already starting. A color and style that truly reflects the change that is... that HAS to go on inside of me. I want to be transparent. That starts with those closest to me though and keeps moving further and further out into the rest of the world.

I start out this way because I realized something over the past few weeks or so that is still sinking in. Nevertheless, it is there. This whole year (2009), I have talked about "My life outside of the box". Granted, I have done some new things this year that I haven't regularly done in the past but these are all OUTWARD appearances and signs. But has anything changed on the inside? I can honestly say that SOME things have changed on the inside but mainly just a growth of knowledge and information. I don't feel like I have let a lot of this stuff really sink in to where my heart, mind and attitude are truly changed because of it. I just got a sick feeling in my stomach when I typed that which tells me that what I'm saying is the truth - conviction. Luckily, if I will allow God to help - I CAN CHANGE! *Sigh* This is not going to be easy. In fact, there are some parts of it that will be downright rough and treacherous. Remembering these 2 facts first and foremost will help me change (Taken from Beth Moore's Believing God): 1) God is who He says He is 2) God can do what He says He can do.

I will elaborate more on these points in the near future and then ponder the 3rd one: I am who God says I am.